Leadership, family, theology and world events
I feel like being a parent is often portrayed in either a Hallmark like picture, all sweet and quiet, or a comedy like depiction, life without fun, exhausting and miserable parents who are dreaming about their past life. What has been my experience? I have to warn you that my confession is not all pretty and sweet.
Being a dad means a lot of “not fun” things.
There is no fun in changing diapers. In fact I never met anyone who was excited about it. There is no fun in waking up several times a night or trying to ignore a child’s cry hoping that your wife will get out of a bed a little bit faster next time.
The worst is having a sick child. A sick child is not just a crying child; it is a desperation in trying to figure out what is the issue or falling to help your child. In those moments you wish for the child to grow up so you won’t be dealing with those issues. But a little child means small problems and older kid – bigger issues.
There is no fun in hearing your kids quarreling or teaching your kids the same thing a hundred fifty two times and seeing no results.
And the list continue…
Being a dad is not a life without fun, but rather it is a different fun.
It is hard to explain a certain experience to someone who never had one. How can the beauty of nature be explained to someone who cannot see or the pleasure of the sound of music to one who cannot hear? How can you explain the bouquet of emotions of holding your little precious child in your hands when you never had one? And no, holding someone else’s child is not the same.
What kind of a pleasure or a fun can be compared to hearing the word “daddy” for the first time or a gratification when the little beauty is giving you a hug?
Hearing “I am not a baby anymore” breaks your heart, but also fills you with gratefulness for all those few short years that you did have your baby.
There is an indescribable fun in seeing them grow into the men or women that you wanted them to be and seeing them worship God and becoming friends with Him.
And finally, with all honesty and without any exaggeration, I feel like I can trade all the fun of this world just to hear the phrase: “if I think of the perfect husband, I want him to be like my dad.”
Does a being a dad means a life without fun? No! It means a different fun. It is not a less fun. It is greater, but different. It is fun of a life that has not been wasted. It is the fun of great accomplishment. It is a fun of having being loved back and having best friends in your kids. It is the fun of becoming a better you.
Being a dad changes you.
You are finally really growing up, becoming responsible and setting an example to your kids.
It helps you to be less egocentric.
Self-discipline is finally becoming today’s matter instead of a constant tomorrow’s issue.
Being lonely? Forget about it.
Your self-fulfillment is now something concrete rather than abstract.
Being a dad means some of the “no fun” things, but also a lot of “the real fun” things.